I would hate to be a teenage or young adult growing up these days. It was hard enough back in the 90’s and 00’s but to become a young women and start dating today would, in my opinion, be so much harder. These days everything is captured on camera, whether you want it to be or not. And all those photos are put out there for the world to see, to like, to comment on and to ultimately judge. Therefore young people of today, and older people too, are living a filtered life. Every picture has to be perfect, every snap filtered, every selfie air brushed in some way. Confidence and self esteem are being dramatically hit by our inability to just be ourselves. To simply capture a moment in time as it happens, exactly as it happens and share it because we enjoyed it. This needs to change and the dating website we love dates are on a mission to encourage people to be real. They want people to get back to loving themselves, to live unfiltered lives and to realise that it is okay, more than okay in fact, to be happy in their own skin just the way they are.
This is a message I can whole heartedly get behind which is why I am working with WeLoveDates to help promote this campaign and one of the ways I am doing that is by sharing my own 5 ways to boost your confidence.
1 Write a list of all your good qualities.
Think about everything that is good bout you. Everything that you like about yourself and write it down. This can be things such as appearance, like having nice hair or toned legs. It can be achievements you are proud of such as qualifications, job or completing a fitness challenge. It can include your characteristics and personality traits such as being a good listener or making people laugh. Write down as may as you can and then read them back to yourself over and over again. Then keep this list to hand and make it a habit to read it at least 3 times a week and it will continue to help you boost your confidence.
Find an affirmation that resonates to you. Or create one of your own. Then type it up, write it down or print it off and stick it to the mirror where you will see it at the start and end of every day. The more you read these the more you will believe them.
3 Count your blessings or your gratitude’s.
This is something I have now been doing every day for over a year and it really helps me de stress and get perspective, especially on a bad day. At the end of the day pick out 10 things that you are grateful for about your day. This can be hard at first but the more you do it the easier it becomes. They don’t have to big things they can be small things like being grateful it didn’t rain on your walk to work, or being grateful that your work colleagues liked an idea you had. These gratitude’s will be sure to lift your mood and boost your confidence as you remember all the good things that have happened to you or because of you each day.
4 Self care
Take some time out to relax. A healthy relaxed mind can work wonders for your confidence and self esteem. Pencil in time each day to focus just on you. It doesn’t have to be a lot of time it could be half hour to read a book and enjoy a cup of tea, or a bubble bath with a face mask and a glass of fizz. It might be that you have a hobby that you don’t get to enjoy as much as you would like or that you want to get outside and walk more often. Whatever it is try and schedule it in in advance as that way you will be more likely to stick to it and feel happier. If this sounds a bit alien to you and you don’t know where to start then why not try following a 14 day self-care challenge to help you get going
5 Be true to you
Think about the you you want to be. Post those selfies that represent you at your happiest. It doesn’t matter if this is you after a run, or a no make up selfie taken with the kids. Those pictures are the real ones, the ones we should want to be remembered for, the ones that one day our children will look at and smile as they remember the times we played, laughed and ran around with them. Not the times we perfected our hair, make up and outfits.
So just be real, be confident and try your hardest to stop worrying about what others think.
(This article has been written in collaboration with get blogged and we love dates.)