How a RAOK eased the pain of losing a baby

We often talk about carrying out random acts of kindness (RAOK) and how we can use these to help others. Lots of people like to share what they did with the world through social media and discuss how it made them feel but we don’t always get to hear from the people who received those acts, so this year as well as taking part in my year of giving and completing some RAOK of my own, I will also be speaking with people who have been on the receiving end of such acts and finding out what impact it has had on their life.

 

Here, Julz from The Red Head Diaries tells you all about her experience…….

I have always loved the idea of random acts of kindness; it kind of gives you this warm feeling that in a world where it can often be ugly and cruel, these pieces of kindness shine through and give a little bit of light.

I guess this is what happened to us.

In 2011 I joined an online forum with like-minded Mums, all of whom were expecting their babies in the same month. It was (is) a lovely group; although some of us have never met we became friends.

My daughter ended up being born 13 weeks early (26+6), born fighting she was our miniature hero. Surprisingly having a premature baby was lonely; but I was able to find help and support from this online group. They loved the updates and they never once made me feel unwelcome with this new baby. I loved updating them with her progress as much as they seemed to love hearing about it.

When she passed away at five weeks old it left us lost and confused; numb, we had no idea what was happening around us, our world had fallen apart. My husband and I took the decision to go away for a few days, a way from what was happening at home; to try and get our heads around everything.
Upon our return, I had a message from one of the Mums asking for my address, and whether we had returned home yet, I replied.

Days later I had forgotten the conversation but we received a parcel, only we were out at the time so had to collect from the sorting office.

We couldn’t believe our eyes when we opened it, to find a beautiful wooden memory box, personalised to our daughter. Inside it had sheets of poems, a tiny named cushion; a little locket with her photo in. It has literally been one of the nicest things given to us since she died in 2012.

We are still so touched by this bit of kindness, and will always remain grateful.
You see this box became even more special, when we ended up not receiving such a thing from the hospital due to our situation; receiving it from these women really felt like people cared, that they loved her too.

We have since also done Random Acts of Kindness, things like paying for items locally-but anonymously; I candy-cane ‘bombed’ various places too. I love doing it, mostly do them in memory of our daughter.

 

Thanks to Julz for sending beautiful story in to The Strawberry Fountain so that I could share it with you all. I hope this helps people to see that RAOK can be done in many different ways and that the effects can be long lasting.

 

If you have a story you wish to share please do get in touch.

 

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